One year ago...

...it was youth camping.  There was excitement in the air, and we were all anticipating another wonderful weekend of hanging out and connecting and making memories.

...but there was heaviness too.  Questions about the future weighed on many minds.  In only a month school would start...and "Waldo" was yet to be found.  This school year would be my last year of school... my senior year.  It was supposed to be perfect...but still no teacher?  I struggled with accepting God's timing and embracing what may be God's will.  We talked about it and asked questions and tried our best to figure it all out... all to no avail. 

 And there was talk about a kid's ministry in our community.  I spent hours brainstorming with my visionary friend Missy that weekend as we tried to figure out all manner of details about where to start and what to do first.  We asked advice and discussed possibilities, and finally came to only a few vague conclusions. 

Then I called my mom Saturday...and was bombed with this:

Saturday night, our youth group had a time of sharing around the campfire.  God moved in and through us.  We prayed for each other and blessed each other.  We sang together and shared our hearts.  We were there for each other...such an incredible blessing.

Today, I look back at that weekend with complete contentment.

I remember the struggle. the questions. the wondering. the lack of trust. the discussions. the unknowns.

...but now I see beyond that weekend.  I see that three weeks later, God revealed the man He had been preparing all along to be our school teacher.  

Two months later, my uncle faced the last enemy, death, and was found ready and willing to go.  

Six months after that weekend, after hours of meetings and inviting kids and discussing more details, we had our first kid's club.

Now I look back and realize that all the hard things I was struggling with and questioning and dealing with have completely faded.  They are finished.  Truly hindsight is better than foresight... but had I known all the answers to my questions instantly, I would have become overwhelmed.  God worked things our beautifully in His perfect timing according to His perfect will.

Psalm 77:6-14 {NIV}

My heart meditated and my spirit asked:

“Will the Lord reject forever?
    Will he never show his favor again? 

Has his unfailing love vanished forever?
    Has his promise failed for all time?

Has God forgotten to be merciful?
    Has he in anger withheld his compassion?”

Then I thought, “To this I will appeal:
    the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand. 

I will remember the deeds of the Lord;
    yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. 

I will consider all your works
    and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”

Your ways, God, are holy.
    What god is as great as our God? 

You are the God who performs miracles;
    you display your power among the peoples.

 And now... as I look once more into my life, and consider the questions I'm dealing with today, will I remember the deeds of the Lord?  In a year from now, I may look back on this month, remember the struggle, yet be content in knowing that everything turned out perfectly.  In the meantime, my trust and faith are being stretched and strengthened.

"Your ways, God, are holy."

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Never settle for less!